If 'Two wrongs don't make a right', then what don't ten wrongs make?
If a politician lies in the forest and no one is around to hear it, is he still a douche?
According to statistics, there is a 60% probability that this sentence is true, but only 2% of all statisticians will think so; this comes with a p value of 0.06, of course.
In my spare time, I volunteer with the Baby Harp Seal Defense Institute. Fair warning: if you see a Baby Harp Seal with a bandoleer, run.
(Image borrowed here and enhanced in Photoshop CS4 by me.)
Pablo Picasso did not become wealthy through his paintings, but through shrewd investments in surreal estate.
If Einstein was so smart, how come he always misspelled emcee?
What kind of sick bastard teaches kids to sing,'Tom Dooley'? It was the first song I learned when I took guitar lessons, at age 7 (in a masterpiece of irony, 'Kumbaya' was the second).